Family Ties Episode Don't Kiss Me, I'm Only The Messenger Transcript

Page 3

Steven: Alex, obviously, this girl is a lot more important to Skippy, then she is to you.  I think you know what you should do.

Alex: You're right Dad, I should have put a stop to this a long time ago, and I'm going to.  Or at the very least next week.

Steven: Alex.

Alex: All right I'll call her.

Steven goes out the back door.

Alex picks up the phone and calls Jane.

Alex: Jane, yeah, it's me again, listen, how would you like to have dinner at Guido's? 

Holds the phone away from his ear, momentarily.

Alex: That much huh?  Alright, ok, it'll be great, candle light, quiet music, and Skippy.

At the restaurant:

Skippy and Alex walk to a table waiting for Jane to arrive.

Skippy: I'm very nervous. I'm more than nervous.  I'm petrified.  What if I say the wrong thing, or do the wrong thing?

Alex: Look, Skippy just trust your instincts, ok, you can't go wrong.

Skippy: I brought along ten dollars.  I thought about giving it to Jane as a gift.

Alex: On second though, ignore your instincts.

Jane enters.

Jane: Hello guys.

Skippy: Oh, Jane, tries to stand up and knocks over the table.  Won't you join us?

Alex: You'll have to excuse Skippy, he's feeling a little peppy tonight.  Why don't we all just sit down, and get to know each other a little better.

Jane: I'm all for that.

Alex: So, Skippy, why don't you tell Jane a little bit about yourself.  Why don't you tell her about the time you saved your little sister's life?

Skippy: Oh it was nothing really, just a matter of simple reflexes.

Alex: I'm going to go wash my hands ok? You two get to know each other a little better while I'm gone.

Skippy: Alex, Please don't leave me.

Skippy grabs Alex's jacket.

Alex pries Skippy's hands off.

Alex: Skippy. 

Looks over at Jane.

Alex: We're very close. Skippy, I'll be right back, ok?

Skippy sits back down.

Jane: So how long have you known Alex?

Skippy tries to answer but can't.

Jane: I don't remember, do you live next door or across the street from Alex?

Skippy tries to answer but can't.

Jane: Are you alright?  You're not having some kind of attack are you?

Skippy shakes his head.

Skippy: No!

Jane: Good.  I'm really glad we had this opportunity to talk.

Alex comes back.

Alex: Hi, I hope I gave you two enough time alone together.

Jane: I think so.

Skippy: I'm going to go wash my hair.

Alex: Skippy, you mean your hands.

Skippy: Right.

Skippy stands up.

Skippy: Right. I'm going to go wash the hair on my hands.

Skippy runs into a waiter and the waiter drops what he was carrying.

Jane: I missed you while you were gone Alex.

Alex: I was only gone for two minutes Jane.

Jane: I don't know what it is about you Alex, you bring out the animal in me.

Jane leans over.

Jane: I hope I'm not being to forward.

Alex: I understand.

Alex and Jane kiss.

Mallory and Jennifer enter the restaurant.

Mallory: We're here to pick up a pizza for Keaton please.

Jennifer sees Alex and Jane kissing.

Jennifer: Mallory look.

Jennifer points and Mallory sees what she's point at.

Skippy comes back from the restroom and spots Jennifer and Mallory, but doesn't see Alex and Jane kissing.

Skippy: Jennifer and Mallory, what are you guys doing here?

Mallory seems flustered.

Mallory: Um, We're um, we're...

Skippy: Come over and say hello to Alex and Jane.

Mallory: Um, Skippy don't go over there.

Mallory spins Skippy around to face her so he won't see Alex and Jane.

Skippy: Why not?

Mallory: Um...

Grabs Skippy's arms and kisses him on the mouth.

Afterward, Mallory steps back, shocked that she had actually kissed Skippy.  Jennifer holds on to Mallory, thinking she might fall.

Skippy: I'm sorry Mallory, but I'm spoken for.  I better be getting back to my date.

Mallory: Skippy, don't.

Skippy turns around and sees Alex and Jane kissing.

Skippy screams.

Alex then screams and jumps backwards.